


if we could be better

by tysunkete (aozu)



Series: log(minus 1) anthology [16]
Category: D.Gray-man
Genre: Angst, Canon Universe, M/M, Mind Control
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-04
Updated: 2017-12-04
Packaged: 2019-02-10 17:35:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,137
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12916851
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aozu/pseuds/tysunkete
Summary: For the prompt:20|things you said I wasn't meant to hear





	if we could be better

**Author's Note:**

> Originally written: 22/07/2015.
> 
> Alternate summary: Kanda is trying to save Lavi who is mind controlled and wants to kill him.

Kanda always knew that Lavi held back when he fought under pretense of that stupid persona, but he never really knew _how_ much, until he finds himself groaning at the knife stabbed into his thigh. It fucking _hurts_ —sure he heals abnormally fast, though now that was weakening a lot, but it doesn’t change the fact that it’s painful as hell, mostly likely aimed on purpose by the fucking Bookman junior. Lavi—if Kanda can really call him as such now—is knocked out cold courtesy of him after much effort, and Kanda hastily rips his shirt for some makeshift fabric that he can bind the other’s hands in. Once satisfied that the redhead is bound, Kanda rips off another piece to bind the bleeding gash on his thigh.

Fuck, he didn’t think busting Lavi out of the Noah’s confinement would be that much of a hassle. Sure he anticipated guards and maybe one or two Noahs that might be lurking around, but they’ve done enough recon to ensure that tonight would’ve been safe—just akumas around, Noahs were being called to somewhere, and it was the opening they’ve had in weeks since they’ve discovered that Lavi was being held captive here.

He just didn’t expect Lavi—the person he was trying to _save_ —attempting to kill him in the process.

Kanda swears under his breath. Sure he and Lavi never really gotten along that well—he’s tried to kill the redhead plenty of times in the past, _maybe_ jokingly—but Lavi has never tried to harm him once. When Lavi had came towards him the moment he managed to break the door open, he wasn’t prepared for the knife that lunged directly for his throat.

It was bizarre as fuck, but when there was only snarling and biting in the attempt to kill him (thigh stab included), Kanda could only deduce that Lavi wasn’t in the right mind and had to knock him out. It’s a shitty situation to be in for sure; Kanda doesn’t think he can carry the redhead very far thanks to that fucking stab wound but they need to leave before more akumas or Noahs come.

With a lot of painful grunting Kanda manages to drag the unconscious redhead slung roughly around his shoulder into the woods behind the compound. He moves them for about twenty minutes before he collapses from the exhaustion and pain, Lavi taking the brunt of the impact when Kanda’s knees buckle to the side.

There is a loud moan of pain that doesn’t come from Kanda.

“…O-oww…the fuck…” the redhead mutters, shaking his head to flick his bangs to the side when his hands don’t seem to come up. “…Y-yuu…” he breathes as he realises the weight crushing on him looks very familiar. “Are you—is that—are…you’re…you’re Yuu, right?”

“Don’t use my first name, dumbass,” Kanda grunts, shifting to heave himself into a better sitting position.

They’re deep enough amongst the trees, it should buy them a bit of time.                

Lavi cracks a grin. “If I’m hallucinating again, well, it’s the most realistic one so far. What took you so long? Say…why are my hands tied up?”

Kanda sucks in a deep breath, pressing on his bloodied thigh. “You tried to kill me,” he grits out.

The redhead frowns. “I tried to—”

But before the sentence is finished, Lavi abruptly doubles over, hands trying to struggle hard out of their bonds. A loud cry of anguish breaks through, and Kanda stares, unsure of what to do.

“Rabbit—“

Loud swears come from Lavi’s mouth, and when the redhead looks up, his eye is frenzied, mouth wide and canines bared. Kanda instinctively draws his sword just as Lavi scrambles to get up from his knees and lunges towards him, snarling and hissing. Kanda finds himself forced up against the bark of a tree with one of Lavi’s knee pressing directly onto his wound, while his hands are busy holding Mugen right against Lavi’s neck, drawing blood. It seems like the redhead doesn’t care, only to struggle harder to free his hands behind his back, bloodlust thick in his expression.

“Lavi—“ Kanda manages, but Lavi tries to bites him on the neck, disregarding the sword pressing deep into his throat. “Fuck—shit—“

Kanda shoves the redhead as hard as he can, heaving his entire weight onto the other. He has one hand jamming Lavi’s head to the ground, with Mugen still pressed against the throat, but Lavi doesn’t stop struggling, face twisted into a dark snarl.

“What the fuck is happening?” Kanda demands.

Lavi—if it is—glares at him with his face pressed sideways into the dirt, but a smirk slowly crawls up his lips.

Kanda grips him tighter in suspicion.

“Are you going to kill me?” The redhead rasps, voice rough and very unlike the usual nasal tone. “ _Can_ you kill me, Yuu?”

“…Who the fuck are you?”

The redhead relaxes as the smirk gets wider, not at all bothered by their positions. “ _Lavi_ , of course.”

“You’re not.”

“How would you know?” the other counters. “How much did you truly know me, hmm?”

“I know enough,” Kanda spits roughly, pressing the sword harder against the other’s neck. “Get out of him.”

“Enough?” the redhead repeats with a chuckle, ignoring everything else that was said. “Like how much this boy loves you? Even though he’s a Bookman and Bookman have no hearts—it’s all very tragic, Yuu, how he could never tell you, but well, _I’m_ not Lavi now, am I?”

Kanda doesn’t budge one bit. “What the hell are you playing at?”

“You can’t kill me,” The other grins widely, nothing like the cheesy grins Lavi used to do. “Not when you know he loves you.”

“Like I care,” Kanda retaliates.

“You always did,” the redhead says before abruptly going still.

Kanda waits for a few seconds, wary. “…Rabbit?”

There is no response, so he leans further forward to check if Lavi passed out again, but the slight drop in his guard was all the other needed to slam their foreheads together. Kanda curses, scrambling to hold his ground, but he’s pushed onto his back and hands are around his throat, squeezing tighter with every passing second. He has Mugen sharp against Lavi’s neck but the dripping blood down the blade doesn’t do _anything_ —the redhead presses down harder no matter how deep Kanda’s sword pierces into his skin.

“L-Lavi—stop—“

“I’ll bring him back after you’re dead,” The redhead growls, eye wide and mouth smiling. “To see what he’s done with his own hands.”

Kanda struggles wildly, breath becoming short and head dizzy. He can only slice Lavi’s throat from here—he can, but he _can’t_ —

He desperately chokes for air, vision going black.

“Ahh…he loves you, Yuu. He loves you.”


End file.
